The Joyous Divorce

Tonight is Lag B’Omer! Jews are accustomed to celebrating important miraculous events in our history. Lag B’Omer is unique in the fact that we celebrate the Yartzeit (anniversary of passing) of Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai – the great Talmudic sage and author of the Zohar. For centuries, Jews would make the pilgrimage to his grave in Miron, Israel to celebrate with bonfires, music, dancing - expressions of unbridled joy. These celebrations are customary throughout the diaspora as well.

On the surface it may seem odd to commemorate the passing of one of our great leaders with joyous pomp and ceremony. I’d like to share a story of Rabbi Shimon that may clarify this oddity.

After ten years of childlessness, a couple decided it would be prudent for them to divorce. Although they were happily married, they both wished to have children and figured that this blessing was not destined for them as a couple. They approached Rabbi Shimon Bar Yochai to arrange a get (Jewish divorce).

Hearing their story, the Rabbi advised them that just as their marriage was celebrated with a joyous banquet – the divorce should be celebrated in kind. After the party they should return to him and he will arrange the divorce. Heeding the Rabbi’s advice, they invited the entire town to a lavish feast. During the meal, the husband had his full share of wine and lovingly called to his wife: “You may take the most precious valuables of my home with you as you return to your parent’s home.” After a short while he drifted off to sleep.

The wife indicated to her servants to lift her husband and carry him to her father’s home for the night. The next morning when he awoke, he was surprised to find himself in his soon to be ex-father-in-law’s home. “Why am I here?” he asked. “You offered that I should take the most precious valuables with me from the marriage. You are most precious to me,” she replied.

When Rabbi Shimon heard of this turn of events he immediately prayed on their behalf and blessed them with many happy and healthy years of continued marriage. Within the year, they were blessed with a child.

Why did Rabbi Shimon not pray for the couple when they initially approached him? Why did he advise them to celebrate their upcoming divorce?

Rabbi Shimon’s advice guided the couple in realizing that the unfortunate cause for the dissolution of their marriage was of divine nature and therefore worthy of celebration. After they demonstrated that they had accepted the reality of childlessness out of love and joy – he felt they were worthy of miraculous intervention.

As the author of the Zohar, Rabbi Shimon’s unique contribution to Torah scholarship was the study of the inner dimension of the Torah. This study allows us to appreciate the inner dimension of our lives and to understand that everything that occurs is for the best. We need to condition ourselves to accept it all with joy.

Therefore, on the day of his passing he promised to bless all that will celebrate this day in the spirit of his teachings – with unbridled joy.

I invite you to join us in celebrating Lag B’Omer at the Community BBQ, Thursday, May 26 at 5:30pm. See below for more details.

Best wishes for a joyous Lag B’Omer!

Rabbi Yisrael Greenberg